Sex, Love… and Work

The last couple of weeks I’ve been dealing with an extremely shitty challenging work assignment. While I don’t want to bore you all to tears with my litany of job related complaints (I gave serious consideration [not really] to titling this post OMG My Job F-ing SUXX!!! before I remembered that whiners are assholes), but I do want to point out some parallels I’ve notice between myself as an employee and myself as a sex/love addict. I…

1. Am completely at a loss when it comes to setting appropriate boundaries.

2. Always settle for crumbs.

3. Am never “right sized.” I’m either too good or not good enough for a man and/or a job.

4. Go after shit I don’t want (loser guys, jobs I’m over qualified for), because I know I’ll get it.

5. Rarely go after what my heart truly desires (a good man, a job that fulfills me) either out of fear of rejection, or belief that I’m not deserving.

6. See rejection and judgement when none actually exists.

7. Push and poke just to see how far I can get.

8. Neglect self care and always put the “other” in front of my own needs.

9. Can be a fucking bitch.

Thankfully I’ve made a lot of headway in these areas when it comes to sex and love, but am still struggling with these character defects in other aspects of my life. I’m confident, though, that as I continue on this path the transformation will happen in throughout my life.

Also, because I believe in practicing gratitude, I need to put it out there that although my current job isn’t my dream job, it certainly doesn’t suck (or even SUKK). Most days, it’s a pretty decent gig. But even in the tough times, I’m still so grateful for this job and for all that it affords me.

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17 comments on “Sex, Love… and Work

  1. rgonaut says:

    you seem pretty normal actually!

  2. Lawryn_M says:

    I think as a society we have a tendency to use phrases “love life” “work life” and “personal life” as if our one life involves three separate people. You bring up some great points. It makes sense then that how we treat ourselves in our love lives would spill over into other areas of our lives. You’ve given me some stuff to think about!

  3. bossymoksie says:

    Great post!
    And knowing is half the battle…
    Now you can work on doing something about it.

  4. petrichoric says:

    A new post! And I didn’t even notice for two days! I’m in a similar boat to yourself. My job is far from challenging but it actually pays pretty well. I would like something more creative, but, like you, I lack the confidence to make that a reality.

    • Imperfect says:

      I’d trade my challenging low-paying job for your well-paying non-challenging job any day of the week!

      Sorry it took me so long to answer your comment. I’ve been too busy to hang out of wordpress much lately.

      • petrichoric says:

        No worries about the late reply. I haven’t been blogging/commenting much lately myself. Super busy doing this five-week/12 hours per week group therapy class. It basically teaches me how not to be a crazy-ass bitch. 🙂 I just finished the class. It’s too early to tell if it worked. Thinking of attending an SLAA meeting next Saturday. I find it helpful to attend groups of this nature. Reminds me that I’ve got lots of stuff to work on.

  5. Stacia says:

    Just stumbled upon your blog and we have a lot in common! Looking forward to reading more 😉

  6. lexiconlover says:

    keep on keeping on gf :–)

  7. Ms. Tress says:

    I definitely feel taken for granted at my job, so I totally relate to this point. But like you said, it does make sense that someone who has problems setting boundaries/allowing herself to be hurt in relationships would have problems in their work environment as well, especially if it’s male-dominated. That’s probably at the core of my work issues, too. So hang in there. You’re not alone!

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